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For a while there I was afraid I'd awaken some suppresseddesires in Brandon. But he was pretty adamant that 'Monique' be a onetime event. I was the only woman he wanted in our relationship.But our little role playing renewed a conversation we've been havingoff and on since we became a serious couple. After Anna had hersurgery, I began thinking about my own body. I've had dysphoria, justnot debilitating dysphoria. Sometimes I think my smart ass demeanor isjust a defense mechanism to get me through those feelings.After Monique left (the costume returned to the closet), Brandon and Isat quietly on our bed just looking at each other. He's told me thatwhen and if I decide the time is right for GCS, he will support me.It's my body, my decision. He loves me! My body is just a part of thewhole package."Brandon, when we role play, are we trying to, I don't know,compensate, maybe give us options that we, I don't have?" What are you really asking?" I'm going to be helping a couple of young. We got along because we enjoyed the same things, I would take her places, and I wouldn’t have sex. I think I grew on her, for she became quite affectionate. She was grateful, I suppose.”I could see Cassie was itching to say something, but I ploughed on.“I loved being with her, she was great company and very easy on the eye. Yes, then I did want her, but she was married to Gary and he was my mate. We kissed on a couple of occasions and it seemed some passion was there on her part, but once Gary asked me to stop seeing her, I heard nothing more from her. I put her behind me, she was irrelevant again. There were other women – Deirdre for instance.“Then Gary came and attacked me, and that’s when I learned of the divorce. I know she came to tell me, but she could have phoned and she didn’t. Why? She said she didn’t want to queer your pitch, but I think it was more because she had that man lined up. He’s her type. She let me down badly by telling Gary what we did, or rather didn’t. That.
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